Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is, I believe, a common ailment affecting those who are involved in war. I don't know if I had (have) PTSD or not. But, I do know the horrors of war remain embedded in your brain for a long, long time.

During WWI soldiers were diagnosed with "Shell Shock". This continued through WWII. It wasn't until after Viet Nam that PTSD was considered a rather common occurrence in those who served.

I was in Viet Nam in 1966.....46 years ago. I remember upon my return to civilian life that I often had nightmares about things that happened. I know that my service during war time changed my outlook on various matters. Even today, I experience the occasional nightmare.
As General Sherman once stated, "War is hell." That is an absolute truth. War is hell for the participants as well as the non-combatant civilians living in the country where the war is occurring.

War causes those in the military to do things totally prohibitive in society. Killing people, and treating everybody including women and children as if they want to kill you. War means overlooking those dead and maimed to accomplish the objective regardless of how unimportant the soldier thinks it is. Those coming behind will pick up the dead and evacuate the maimed and wounded. "Accomplish the mission" is the task at hand.

War means putting your own forces in peril; having to sacrifice forces to save many more. I do not think commanders suffer any less psychological trauma than those carrying out the orders. In fact, commanders may suffer more in those instances where it is impossible to provide the support the troops need because the command is aware of the lack of support before the troops on the line experience it.

War attacks your basic psychological need for safety. You are constantly at peril. According to psychologists, persons in our society must feel safe before adequate attention can be paid to other more complicated needs. That is not true in war. In war you are expected to perform at the best of your ability at all times. The stress is almost unbearable. Once a task starts, you have no idea how long it will last. You just know, the job must be done. You trust your life to the person ahead of you, beside you and behind you and they do the same.

I never shot at anybody. I never was involved in actual combat. My duty was on a Hospital Ship in Viet Nam. It was a 750 bed hospital cruising the coast in support of the U.S. Marines in the "I" Corps area which ranged from Chu Lai in the South northward to North Viet Nam. We usually figured we would have casualties arriving via helicopter about 30 minutes after a firefight started. We never knew how many we would get at a time. Normally a helicopter would carry between 6 and 14 casualties at a time and they always flew in pairs. There were times when we would have a steady stream going through triage for several hours with choppers making several round trips.

I was fortunate to have worked in a surgical ward in a land based hospital before being assigned to the ship. The vast majority of my patients had been sent back to the States from Viet Nam. Many on our ship had never experience those type of casualties and especially before they had been cleaned up. During the first week we had numerous sailors literally throwing up at the horrific sights they saw.

After 45 years, I still recall several I took off the helicopters. It seems the memory is as vivid as the day I experienced it. But I don't think my experience is near as bad as those who were exposed to enemy fire. I can't imagine the nightmares they might experience.

Regardless of what you call it, PTSD is real. It affects some more than others. I have always felt blessed to be able to lead a normal life following my experience. Others have not been as fortunate. "War is hell" long after it is over. It never really leaves you.